MIND
I’ve realized over the past weeks that my mind can be a dangerous enemy. It has made me fall into a deep hole and it has me on such a tight and strong hold that I can’t get out. I’m so confused. Maybe it’s the quarterlife crisis that almost-graduating college students experience. Not knowing what to do next is scary and daunting. Other things trouble me as well and I can’t get them out of my head. I know I have to just for my own well-being, but it’s so hard. When I think I’m doing fine and I’m not thinking about those things anymore, something or somehow I am reminded of everything. Am I destined for failure? Am I destined to be alone? Nothing I have ever done has truly panned out for me. Why am I plagued by so many obstacles and so much pain? I think I have lived my life as a compassionate and loving man. Is it so much to ask for a break and a great blissful and happy experience? I’m so lost. I’m so broken. I wanna cry, but all my tears have dried up. I have no more tears to cry. Everything in life seems to be against me. Negativity seems to be more prevalent than the positives. I don’t really know anymore…Nights are harder to bear now because that’s when my mind wanders and doesn’t know how to turn off. I guess I’ll try to sleep.
